JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
