i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
