When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
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