if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
