Soap is not a condiment
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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