Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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