this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
