But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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