Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize