upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Randomize
