theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
They took my balls.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
