Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Randomize
