I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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