There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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