oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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