dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize