I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
