she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
