you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
