Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
