apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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