okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
