thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
