Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
foreskin is a definite game changer
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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