I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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