She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
