oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
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