Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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