And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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