My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
