we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
