apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
