I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
