She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
