What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
