So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
