you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
