you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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