yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
