real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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