Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
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You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize