It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
