people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
