My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Randomize
