What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
