in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize