i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
This is my gift to your gina
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
