i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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