Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
