oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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