he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize