I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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