her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Randomize
